Accidental Renaissance

When I asked the man who shipped my bike if I would receive any paperwork or insurance, he laughed and shook his head. “No - this is Georgia.” I was instructed to take every conceivably removable piece off of the bike - even the mirrors. And so I set about refitting Strom with every bit of gear I had stripped off, then went in search of a fabricator. 

The task: make a secret compartment under the seat, because reasons. I found a man who loved the idea and donated his time and expertise to make it happen. He generously refused both money and brandy.

He also gave me the name of a supposed electrical wizard, for that morning I noticed that my headlights were dead. There is a known issue with this bike wherein a thin wire inconveniently located under literally everything goes poof. The wizard wasn't there but a group, whose number swelled over time as each interloper took an interest, set to work vivisecting poor Strom. Their "headlight guy" arrived and started ripping the electrics apart with distressing zeal. Bits and bolts were strewn everywhere. The gas tank and airbox were disemboweled, only to reveal that the wire was fine. Fuq.

As we scratched our chins, the wizard arrived, opened up the kill switch, soldered a broken wire, and the problem was solved in less than five minutes. Against all odds, the bike went back together seamlessly, and unless anybody was hiding an errant screw, there were no strays. I lost a day, but learned a tremendous deal about motorcycle anatomy.

For their altruism totalling 16 man hours, I tried desperately to offer payment. Again, refusal of cash and cognac. Typical. 

I readied to book another night at the hotel, but the wizard insisted that I join him far outside of town for dinner with friends and to stay the night. I accepted after significant cajoling, and am glad I did. When he brought out a machine gun, I was so happy. It is a quintessential experience to be taken into someone’s home and handed an AK-47. I was terribly disappointed to learn that it was just a totally kickass BB gun.